We owe nobody an explanation or an accounting, as long as our acts do not hurt or infringe on them. American Book Center. Being separate means being cut off, without any capacity to use my human powers. "The main condition for the achievement of love is the overcoming of one's narcissism. It meant also that the very differences between individuals must be respected, that while it is true that we are all one, it is also true that each one of us is a unique entity, is a cosmos by itself. To keep our site running, we need your help to cover our server cost (about $400/m), a small donation will help us a lot. The selfish person hates himself and does not take care of himself. Love also requires responsibility, which entails staying aware and reacting to the needs of another, whether these are the physical needs of an infant or the emotional needs of a partner. An Exploration of Erich Fromm's The Art of Loving'. At the beginning of his book, Fromm argues that love is not a gift to God that falls from the sky on a person or an emotion that the person suddenly becomes acquainted with, but a not easy skill that must be studied theoretically and practiced, just like any other art. That is, the outside world exists only insofar as it is a tool for satisfying man's desires and desires. It's no surprise that we regard human relationships as an investment to profit from. In this summary of The Art of Loving by Erich Fromm, you'll also discover. Yet, if we call the achievement of interpersonal union "love, " we find ourselves in a serious difficulty.
After Socialism 3 2. Mac's Fireweed Books, Yellowknife. In fact, in erotic love a person sees in his partner an incarnation of human qualities and loves in him the whole of humanity. While this is a fundamental and trivial requirement for all human beings, "The art of Loving" sadly is not a part of educational curriculum. Furby House Books, Port Hope.
While adapting its customs, ways and beliefs while eliminating the "I" and the things that divide the individual and the group through the standardization of the person. Slowly the tension of anxiety mounts, and then is reduced again by the repeated performance of the ritual. Fromm writes: The first step to take is to become aware that love is an art, just as living is an art; if we want to learn how to love we must proceed in the same way we have to proceed if we want to learn any other art, say music, painting, carpentry, or the art of medicine or engineering. Or is it something magical and, therefore, ultimately unknowable?
Hence to be separate means to be helpless, unable to grasp the world—things and people—actively; it means that the world can invade me without my ability to react. Let your deeds be judged, and from your deeds, your real intentions, but know that a free person owes an explanation only to himself—to his reason and his conscience—and to the few who may have a justified claim for explanation. It isn't a feeling, it is a practice. The first axis is the masculine or feminine nature of the gods. I am out for a bargain; the object should be desirable from the standpoint of its social value, and at the same time should want me, considering my overt and hidden assets and potentialities.
—helped shape the landscape of psychology in the mid-twentieth century. In the Victorian age, as in many traditional cultures, love was mostly not a spontaneous personal experience which then might lead to marriage. A. S. Kline © Copyright 2001 All Rights Reserved. Kerr's Corner Books, Cambellford. This miracle of sudden intimacy is often facilitated if it is combined with, or initiated by, sexual attraction and consummation. Self-love is simply one's respect for his or her personal integrity and uniqueness. What are the necessary steps in learning any art? How many lives have been ruined by this need to "explain, " which usually implies that the explanation be "understood, " i. approved. Our failure to recognize this skillfulness aspect is perhaps the primary reason why love is so intertwined with frustration. Shelf Life Books, Calgary. SHOWING 1-10 OF 47 REFERENCES.
It is at the same time the source of guilt and anxiety. It takes years and some heartbreaking experiences to know and identify our emotional blind spots and act in ways to express these hidden emotions to the outside world.
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