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The history of television's artistic aspirations starts to get really interesting in the 1980s, as the Professor writes in Television's Second Golden Age. At this particular moment, I'm not sure I will either. I would watch TV under his guidance, go to his classes, and generally throw myself at his feet in the hope of gaining a new perspective on what is clearly -- whatever one thinks of it -- America's most influential cultural institution. There are formulas more reliably profitable than serial drama with complex characters: Witness "Law & Order, " "CSI" and "Survivor: Thailand, " not to mention "The Jerry Springer Show" and "WWE SmackDown. And that change can be tracked and analyzed by looking at the way it got reflected on television. As he's laid out his reasoning, he's clicked off the small tube that sits directly across from his desk. The camera zooms in on a tearful, rejected Christi. He's been thinking about it, he says. Betty is the butt of every joke, but so far, she seems to be holding her own. When I finally spend an hour with "The West Wing, " I like it better than I'd expected, though my reaction has less to do with its artfulness than with a wildly implausible story line about an idealistic president who destroys a debate opponent by denouncing the politics of sound bites. Puretaboo matters into her own hands song. A few weeks later, I stumble across the hate-spewing hip-hop deity Eminem on "Dateline, " talking about his love for his sweet 6-year-old daughter, and think: I've seen this movie before. The bottom line: Nothing is keeping me glued to the screen. And since TV requires not only a story line that can be interrupted regularly for commercials but one that people can absorb with perhaps a third of their hearts and minds engaged -- because, as is well known, most of us watch television while doing a variety of other things -- then even a show like "The Love Boat" can qualify as an artistic success.
Both Bobs confront the Ultimate TV Question! And yet, as I listen to TV Bob describe the changes those CBS executives ushered in -- he compares them to an earthquake caused by the shifting of a culture's tectonic plates -- I find myself nodding my head. We can hook all those hipsters who think irony makes them immune. Ten women, six roses. Puretaboo matters into her own hands images. There were westerns like "Bonanza" and "Gunsmoke, " and sitcoms like "Green Acres, " "The Beverly Hillbillies" and "My Three Sons. " You see I'm into herbs and botan-an-AN-icals like angelica and marigo-oh-OLD to revi-I-I-talize OHHHH!!
There's Christi, the fatal attraction girl, who seems to be coming on too strong. Call it good craftsmanship, if you want. But I do get through "Seinfeld, " "ER, " "Will & Grace, " "Boston Public, " "Everybody Loves Raymond, " "Bernie Mac, " "8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter, " "Letterman, " "NYPD Blue, " a bit of "24" -- I bail when the hero shoots a guy he's been questioning, then demands a hacksaw with which to cut off his head -- and much, much more. There is one in particular she can't get out of her head—the seductive Krinar Ambassador named Soren. Occasionally the roles are reversed. ) Even got up the next morning to watch bachelorette Christi, the rejected basket case, do "Good Morning, America. " In the past, whenever I violated my personal no-TV rule -- mostly at World Series time -- I'd often find myself staring at the commercials, stunned. And I've got to admit, it's been fun. "A Killer With a Taste for Brains! "
By now, I'm fully prepared to grant "The Sopranos" this exalted status -- in fact, I'm more than a little embarrassed about being the last person in America to discover the show. "Who will be sent home brokenhearted? Practical reasons are another story, however. So they made a radical decision. Ditto for Gwen, Brooke, Helene, Hayley and Heather From Texas.
Take the ubiquitous SUV ads, with their macho fantasies of dominating the natural world. But for now, I was just a newly minted "Simpsons" fan along for the ride as Homer complained to the studio bosses about identity theft, got a quick lesson in television authorship ("The 15 of us began with a singular vision"), had his real personality ripped off and mocked in a revised version of "Police Cops" and fought back -- to hilarious effect -- by changing his name to Max Power. Which one prefers candle wax to candlelight behind closed doors? The reason I didn't watch TV as a kid is that he simply refused to buy one. X kind of free expression, who's to say. The surveyors treat "B. J. " Does Spam have a hip new ad campaign? The misunderstanding is unusual. "Hill Street Blues" was the groundbreaker, to be followed by the likes of "L. A.
"Nannies Who'd Kill! " "When you're ready, " the master of ceremonies tells him at last. Thompson's your man, though he doesn't drink the stuff himself. A shaggy mutt puffing on a cigarette ("I'm a dog. "I'm not going to be okay, " she says. And from that mainstream could soon be heard an anguished cry: How are we gonna sell 'em cars and cola and shampoo and fast food and soap?
With impossible speed and strength, wielding incredible intelligence and advanced technology, the Krinar control this planet and every human on it. Score one for the Professor. I tape a couple more episodes of "The Bachelor, " but while I know from outside sources that my fave is still hanging in there, I somehow never find the time to watch. Yet as an older, wiser and more cynical person, I can also see a less uplifting story line. In other words, "Betty had to be put down. And never mind that he'd put himself out of a job. "There are, like, three different thematic things happening all at the same time here, " the Professor is saying. As enemies surface all around them, Bianca realizes she will have to trust Soren with her heart, even if it means giving up her freedom.